And then...
by Channy
Summary: Legolas and Obi-Wan help each other dress.


AUTHOR: Channy (With random insertions by Colli)  
  
DATE: January 8th, 2002  
  
RATING: PG13  
  
SLASH: Bits.  
  
SITE: http://d-e.diaryland.com  
  
EMAIL: d-e@diaryland.com  
  
SUMMARY: Legolas and Obi-Wan help each other dress.  
  
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Kay.. it sounds like porn, but it's not.  
  
DISCLAIMER: I own not Star Wars, nor Lord Of The Rings, nor pretty much anything.  
  
  
  
1 And then…  
  
Obi-Wan awoke on a bright, shiny, -very- shiny, and blindingly reflective Coruscant morning. He screamed in horrid anguish and flung himself at the transparasteel window, hauling the blinds down, plunging the room into darkness, as he once again fell asleep.  
  
Hearing the commotion from the next room, a light-skinned, long- haired, and altogether beautiful Elf ran into Kenobi's room. He was still wearing his jammies, which were dark blue with silver horsies all over. His mouth quirked into a grin when he saw Obi- Wan laying on the floor under his window, wearing only his black boxers, and snoring quite loudly. He stuck his foot under Obi's back and nudged, "Wake up," he said in his accented voice, "you have to help me with my hair!"  
  
The Elf, Legolas, was pouting now. His hair was long, and completely unbraided. It -must- be braided. He nudged Obi-Wan again, "C'mon..."  
  
Obi-Wan mumbled something in Huttese. Legolas arched an eyebrow, assumed the remark was not pleasant, and thus returned it with on of his own Elvish curses. When they both ran out of things to call the other, Legolas pointed to his head, "This doesn't just happen, yunno!"  
  
The Jedi picked himself up off the floor and stared at his Elven boyfriend, "Fine." He pointed to his bed, "Get on my sleepcouch."  
  
Legolas looked around the room, "Sleep... couch..?"  
  
"What? Elves sleep on grass? Fine, go find some grass." Kenobi was getting annoyed.  
  
Legolas leapt onto the bed and sat cross-legged, "I was just kidding..." He pouted again, and Obi sat beside him.  
  
"Fine.. I'll do your hair, if you do mine."  
  
For the first time in their relationship, Legolas noticed that Jedi -didn't- just wake up with that silly haircut.. and it looked even funnier when it wasn't done up. Soon, the long, long process of hair-braiding had begun.  
  
============  
  
Once their hair looked relatively normal, considering their hairstyles, Obi-Wan remembered that they had yet to get dressed.  
  
"Fuck. Leggy, did you happen to notice that you're wearing jammies?"  
  
The Elf looked down at himself, "Yup, and don't call me Leggy."  
  
He continued, ignoring the comment, "Well... how are we going to get dressed without ruining our hair?"  
  
A shocked look passed over Legolas's fair features, "Oh no!" He thought for a moment, "Wait a second... this is a button-up shirt.. and your not even wearing one!"  
  
Obi-Wan sighed with relief, "Phew... that was close; now, for clothes!"  
  
Leggy ran off to collect the many garments which made up their wardrobes.  
  
When he came back, he decreed that Kenobi should go first. And so they started...  
  
First, they pulled on his toe-socks, then his knee-high normal socks, and his thin leggings. Then, his undertunic, wrist-wraps, tunic, the layers of criss-crossing tunics, and clothbelt to keep his utility belt from chaffing, then his utility belt, and all its utilities; including his lightsaber. Legolas then helped him into his outter trousers, and attempted to fit his feet into the brown leather boots. He fetched his cloak, and tossed that on as well, "There.." He fell onto the bed.  
  
Obi-Wan grinned and motioned t'ward the Elf, "Come over here to me."  
  
Leggy eyed him, "No. Now help me."  
  
Obi-Wan groaned and set to work. He pulled off Legolas's sleep- pants, which created a breeze, and tossed them over his shoulder, "Get your shirt off." He grinned when it was handed to him, and he held up the garment, "Horsies are fun!"  
  
With a swift kick to Kenobi's side, Legolas was back to being dressed. First, Obi-Wan ran out of the room to collect his things.  
  
He returned to find his Elf binding his feet in a light cloth. Obi looked around the dark room and cleared his throat, "Yunno, you really shouldn't bind them in the darkness... Oh, and I found your ring! It was in the soapdish." He flung the plain golden ring, which was caught by Legolas. He looked somewhat nervous as he slipped the ring back on the chain around his neck. Kenobi flipped on the lights, and then flipped to the bed, "Okay now!" He dumped the pile of clothes next to him.  
  
"Yunno..." The Jedi began, "green went out of style two years ago..."  
  
Legolas smirked, "Hun, bleige never /was/."  
  
Obi grinned as he helped pull up Leggy's grey tights. Then the soft-soled Elven boots, and then his long-sleeved white shirt, and then his wrist-wrappings (to stop the chaffing of his bracers), and then his green overshirt, and then his silver vest, and then his criss-crossing greenish tunics, and then his long decorated bracers, and then his belt-cloth, and then his belt, and then his 'harnessed quiver', and then his bow, and then his white-handled daggers, and then his grey Lothlorien cloak, fastened with a silver-gilded green leaf pin.  
  
Kenobi giggled, "Greenleaf."  
  
Legolas hit him, "Shut up, it's not my fault that the Common Speech is so dull!"  
  
"It's -Basic-! How many times do I have to tell you? Bay-sick!" Obi-Wan grinned, yet again.  
  
/And then/, there was a knock at the door. The two scrambled to be the first to answer it - they never got visitors.  
  
It slid open to reveal the Dark Jedi, Xanatos. He let himself into their kitchen and set the mirrored pan and pitcher of water he had been carrying, on their counter, "Allo, then." He was smiling brightly until he saw Legolas. Then his smile turned upside down. "An Elf," he simply stated, "An Elf dating –my- Obi-Wan?" Menace shone in his eyes.  
  
Obi coughed, and explained to Legolas in whisper that Xanatos was some creepy who dropped out of 'Jedi Schooling' as the Elf referred to it, and has been obsessed with him ever since. Aloud he exclaimed that they needed Pepsi, and he'd run to the store to buy some. With that, he escaped.  
  
Legolas and Xanatos stood there eyeing one another.  
  
"So…" Legolas tried.  
  
"So yourself, bitch." Came Xanatos's 'timely' reply. He turned to the sink and started to fill his pitcher, "Must take a while to get all that on, hrm?" He motioned blindly to Legolas's complicated if not utterly beautiful clothing and weaponry.  
  
"Um.. yah, I suppose so."  
  
"Did you remember to go to the bathroom first?" Xanatos asked while slowly letting the water trickle from the pitcher and hit the mirrored bottom of the pan, varying the speed and distance.  
  
Legolas eyed the water uncomfortably, "Actually, no… I didn't…"  
  
"Oh… well, that is unfortunate, isn't it?"  
  
Legolas started rocking back and forth on the balls of his heels, "Shit! Now I've gotta!" And he dashed into the 'fresher.  
  
At which point, of course, Obi-Wan returned from his trip to market, so he called it, "I've got Pepsi!"  
  
Xanatos smiled an enticing smile and slinked up beside Kenobi, "Hey'a Obi…"  
  
Obi-Wan stared blankly at him, "Hey.." He walked over to the 'fridge and shoved the 2 litre of Pepsi in, "So… where's Legolas?"  
  
"He… had to leave, back to Mirkwood, princely matters, you know."  
  
"Um, kay… but," his chin began to tremble, "why would he leave me…?"  
  
At that very precise moment, a green-feathered arrow 'thiwped' through the air, shattering Xanatos's pitcher, and drenching him with that water was left. Xanatos let out a high-pitched yelp, and dived up onto the counter.  
  
Obi-Wan bent down and picked up the arrow, examining the Elvish runes embedded along the shaft, as if it was everyday that stray archers wandered into his home, "Aha!" he announced, "Legolas!"  
  
"No? Really?" Came a dry reply somewhere overhead. Obi-Wan and Xanatos looked up to find Legolas sitting casually on a rafter. "And I didn't leave you, he just wants you all to himself."  
  
Xanatos became defensive, "Nuh-uh! He said he didn't care about you anymore, and he was going home!"  
  
And then, for no reason whatsoever, the portal into Legolas's realm opened in Obi-Wan's kitchen. The Jedi gaped. The Elf jumped gracefully and landed without sound.  
  
While Xanatos was busy staring at the swirling vortex, Legolas creeped with all the cunning of a hunting cat, and shoved him into it, "Ha!"  
  
And then it closed. Obi-Wan turned around to stare at his Elven boyfriend, "How the bloody Force…?"  
  
Legloas shrugged, "I've learned that it's best not to ask questions, just to go with it, besides, he won't last day in Mirkwood. Too evil."  
  
Obi-Wan just continued to stare, "Kay…"  
  
The Elf wrapped an arm around Kenobi's shoulders, "Explain something to me," he said, completely changing the subject, "why exactly do you call this Master Yoda a troll? For one he's far too short, and secondly…" 


End file.
